Shades of Cool
by TheFantasyNinja
Summary: I get both sex and popularity. Amy gets to fuck her rivals girlfriend which is all she cares about. And Liam gets to have arm candy to go to parties with and present to his parents and family at dinners. Like I said, Everyone's winning.
1. Chapter 1

Shades of Cool

**Inspired by Lana Del Rey's Shades of Cool. I plan on big things for this story, which is why it's rated T for now only. Enjoy (;**

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Her lips leave my own and make there way down my neck, each kiss stinging my skin like a burn being dabbed with alcohol. It was the kind of pain absorbed from her, the kind that she always gave me. It was pleasure. I don't bother hiding the moan that leaves my mouth as her tongue finds my nipple, flicking it a few times before fully taking it in her mouth,kissing and sucking slowly.

She always had this effect on me. Always made me shiver and scream. It was pure bliss. Her mouth leaves my chest and I immediately miss the contact but she, as always, makes up for it and drags my panties down with her teeth. Her lips travel up my right inner thigh before meeting with core, sucking and biting.

My hands grip the lavender satin sheets tightly as she has her way with me. My chest is moving more rapidly, my legs building up tension along withy whole body, my moans louder. Filling every inch of space in the room. And that was it, her tongue hitting my spot was the last piece of gum for me.

I calmed down after a few minutes and let my hands move to hold her head gently against my stomach where she had licked her way up to and then rested it there. I move her hair back and look down at her causing her to lay her chin on my stomach and look up at me, both her hands on either side of my waist. I lick my chapped lips and look back up at the ceiling as she stands and makes her way out of the bed,grabbing her bra and black shirt and slipping it on with her blue ripped jeans. I look over at her and sigh deeply but lowly. I didn't want her to go. But she would never stay. It would be breaking the rules. And that was something Amy Raudenfeld never did.

She looks over at me and walks to me after slipping her shoes and gray beanie on, planting a soft kiss to my forehead.

"I'll see you tomorrow same time eh?" I nod at her, answering yes to her question before pecking her lips gently and pulling back. She looks at me wry and grabs her keys and phone leaving my room.

I hear the door downstairs shut and finally, I release a breath I didn't even know I was holding. I got up making my way into the bathroom to wash away the remnants of my previous orgasms that she had given me. Only Amy could do that. Seven in one night. In one hour.

But I wasn't the only one. I'm one of many. I wish I could break through her world. To get her to see she doesn't have to be like that. That it was wrong, but I couldn't. I was to caught up in the sex. The pleasure she gave me.

And I felt dirty for it.

Not because I wasn't the only one she had her way with, but because I was the only one on her list that was in a relationship with someone else. Someone who wasn't as great with their tongue as Amy was. Someone who couldn't make her cum seven times in one hour like Amy does.

That someone also happened to be Amy's rivalry. The second in command of the schools Sex Chain, right next to Amy. Liam Booker, my boyfriend. The dumbass who thinks I don't know he's been fucking every girl Amy had first.

Including me. Which just adds to the dirtiness.

I know I should call it quits with Amy, Even Liam too. But they both give me something I gives me the sex, Liam gives me the fame.

Without them I would be nothing. And that doesn't please me. Which is why I am keeping them both. Easy and quietly. No harm will be done. Besides, Everyone's winning here.

I get both sex and popularity.

Amy gets to fuck her rivals girlfriend which is all she cares about.

And Liam gets to have arm candy to go to parties with and present to his parents and family at dinners.

Like I said, Everyone's winning.

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_make sure to review! Hope you like it! _


	2. Chapter 2

Shades of Cool Ch 2

I locked myself to Liam's side all night, never straying to far. Sitting on his lap, giving him drunk kisses as Shane gets us more shots and beer. We were slurring words to each other lowly at this point.

I don't know how it happened but we ended making our way upstairs, kissing and slamming against walls till we arrived at the bathroom. His hand was at my lower back as he kissed me fast and roughly while reaching behind me with the other one walking us straight into the bathroom.

There was a loud gasp and a shriek that caused both Liam and I to pull away and groan looking behind us at the two women. One on her knees and the other one against the wall with her legs draped over the others shoulders, her hands tangled into that blonde hair. Of course.

I saw her pull away and stand looking between me and Liam then locking her eyes to mine, giving me a small smirk. With that, she took the other girls hand and walked out of the bathroom closing the door behind her. I sighed, even though I was drunk, that still bothered me. Not only was I now not turned on by Liam anymore, but turned on by Amy. And I so badly wish she would come back in her alone and I could push Liam outside to give us some privacy. But I can't because she was gone and I was drunk. Very drunk.

I pulled back from Liam and walked to the sink leaning forward looking into the mirror making sure everything was decent. My make was a mess, my eyes were blood shot red and I couldn't keep my mouth fully closed, only slightly open. Liam wrapped his arms around me and I immediately wanted to throw up. I pushed him back and rushed to the toilet, falling on my knees and spewing my guts into it.

I needed to get home before I passed out. I needed Shane, it's his party and I'm sure he is the only one here who isn't drinking in order to keep things calmed. I look back and see Liam in the tub,passed out. The usual. I stood wiping my mouth before opening the door and dizzily making my way downstairs into the living area towards the front door. I opened it letting the cool air hit me before walking out only to trip and land on my butt, with my palms on the ground. I can't help but groan in pain and irritation. I struggled to stand but once I did, I looked over to the front entrance to see if Shane was around possibly greeting guests and talking to security. To my luck he wasn't.

I turned back around to head inside but was stop by a pair of soft hands wrapping around me from behind,warm lips pressing into the back of my ear. I move my hands back and tangle my fingers into her hair,smiling drunkinly before turning around and wrapping my arms around her neck,pulling our bodies closer. She gave me a cheesy smile as our foreheads touch and I did the same.

This was us. Our form of drunk foreplay. Her lips press against mine for a brief moment before pulling back and whispering, "I missed your moans today Karma" her voice was husky, low. "And i missed yours" I press my lips to her in a slow, intimate kiss as her hands reach down causing her to bend her knees slightly and grip my thighs lifting me up. Instinctively I wrap my legs around her waist as she presses me up against one of the cars, moving her lips slowly down to my jawline, kissing across it and down to my neck. I let out a soft moan once she finds my sweet spot, kissing it then gently sucking slowly. That was sure to mark.

And that only meant one thing.

I was now officially her toy.

And that mark was meant for the entire school to see. Even Liam.

I fisted her hair with my right hand as the other gripped her neck, pulling her lips up to meet mine in another heavy kiss.

This time she pulled away and set me down,her middle and index finger pressing on to my sweet spot, the spot she marked. I watch her smirk and bite her bottom lip slightly.

"You know what this means, Ashcroft?" The words came out rough, and if we weren't in a parking lot I would eradicate her clothes in a second. But i hold back and nod slowly. "Your mine now, bitch. Liam? He can't do shit about it. I run the shots here. I run the chain. Make sure he sees this mark" she walks away with a bitch look on her face and her arms crossed as she walks.

Well, at least the alcohol is not as bad now and I can actually walk and don't feel as fuzzy. So, I run inside and upstairs into the bathroom grabbing Liam's keys before going back down and outside to his car. Once I get in I start it and head back home, I look in the rear view mirror for a quick second then back at the road. The mark pulsating off my skin. Practically glowing in this darkness.

As I walk down the hallway, my binder in my hand and a smirk on my face watching as some people stare. The mark was extremely visible and dark on my light skin to the public eyes. Those who whispered, those who stared, are the ones that she hadn't gotten to yet. Which meant one thing, they were jealous. And me? More attention by the second.

As I walked and people stared and whispered, I passed Amy who looked at me with a smirk as she walked by me as well. I kept looking forward with a wider smirk and now entering my classroom,I made my way to the front and took my seat.

All eyes on me. Even the teacher.

I watch as Shane took a seat next to me upon arriving and looked at my neck. He let out a chuckle and looked at the front of the room "Oh Ashcroft, what have you gotten yourself into, wait till Liam finds out" I scoff and turn my head to face him, "I was already fucking her before she made the mark, and I already saw Liam this morning when he picked his car up, he was pissed, but at Amy for making another mark" he shook his head "Yeah, but that was just the first base of fucking Amy Raudenfeld. It's the next bases that really count, and he has all his rights to be. That bitch has marked ten more than him, she's getting orgasm points by the nights. Which means, he's losing.", I look at him and roll my eyes. "Well Liam should pick up his game." I turn my head back to the front as the teacher begins his lesson. But the only real thing on my mind were Shane's words on Amy and her sex. There's more to it than what she gave me?

I was pissed, curious and irritated all at once. I slammed her a lot harder than I should have into the messy desk full of papers that are now scattered and on the ground.

This time I was in fucking control, not this bitch.

I pressed my lips hard to hers as I dig my nails into her hips pushing her to the edge of the desk and against me, her left hand wrapped around my neck and the other holding on with dear life to the edge of the desk as our lips moved hard and fast, but most evidently hungry. I pulled back and pushed her back hard so she was laying down as I crawled over her and place my lips at her neck,sucking at it, grabbing the skin between my teeth hard enough to draw blood which I taste of my tongue. My hands find her buttoned up red flannel and rip it open, the tip of my tongue travels down her neck and collarbone to the center of her chest. I hear her groan,pushing her hips up for some sort of friction,but that only enrages me and makes me pin them back down.

Well fuck. Just as it was getting good, the bell rings indicating lunch was over. I pull back and groan, clearly annoyed as I look down at Amy who is propped up on her elbows, her right knee bent up on the desk and the other hanging loosely over it. There's a smirk on her face as she stands up buttoning her flannel back up and grabbing her back pack. I look at her then back down before the realization of what I did hit me.

She grips my chin roughly,forcing me to look at her. "The next time you pull a move such as taking control like that again, I promise you will not be able to fucking walk from what I will do to you. Nor will you be able to touch me" she let's go of my chin and heads to the door opening it and looks back at me, "but I'll give you props kid, that was hot" and with that she was gone.

And here I stood, alone and wondering what the fuck her other bases were, and what she meant with what she would do to me if I tried that again.

My mind says I should get her to punish me. My heart doesn't say shit because I locked it up and prevented it from speaking.

That's what it caused to fuck Amy and use Liam.

Guess I'm a heartless bitch.

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_don't forget to review (; _


	3. Chapter 3

Shades of Cool Chapter 3

It smelled like alcohol and cheap perfume. It was hot. I was insanely sweaty, and Amy's body was literally wet from sweat. She was laying next to me now, drops of sweat on her toned stomach and legs. Every inch of her. Her chest was moving up and down heavily, who ever saw her without knowing what happened might think she was having a panic attack. I looked at her with my mouth open and my breathing rigid before I stood up and walked over naked to my closet. I opened it and pulled out a towel from the shelf on the top and threw it at Amy, I grabbed the other for myself and began wiping away at the sweat.

Jesus, I didn't think this is what Shane meant by other bases of fucking Amy. I look over at her and she's in her black bra and gray sweats, the sweat now gone from her toned stomach and chest. She threw the towel back at me and plopped back down on the bed relaxing a bit closing her eyes, I slip on my own sweats and loose shirt before making my way over to her. I lay next to her and look at the ceiling.

This really was a whole other base. Amy NEVER stayed after having sex. But we were both just that worn out from what just happened. And besides, we both needed it.

Me because I like fucking Amy.

Amy because she got the shit beaten out of her by Liam after school and immediately came here. I helped her a bit and then eventually the pain subsided when we kissed. And one thing led to another.

I turn my head to face her and look at the cut on her upper lip and her swollen black eye, I let my eyes travel to her stomach which had bruises on the side. Her ribs were not broken but pretty beat on the outside.

Oh well, Amy knows what she is doing according to her. She said that this was bound to happen, that it all about keeping control with her competition. I shrugged it off and preceded to help clean the cuts. What happened after she took her bra off for better visual is no mystery.

I hear my phone ring and turn on my side to grab it off the night stand, I check the caller I.d and feel immediately annoyed but answer either way. "What do you want Lauren?", It came out harsh and annoyed, just as intended. "To know if my fucking step sister is okay. I know what Booker did, Shane texted me and told me. How bad does it look?", I felt bad for a split second but shrugged that off and replied. "It's not that bad, she'll be fine. I made sure she got a little dose of medicine", Those words came out husky and sexy, which is not what i intended. "Okay gross. Make sure she gets home safe, Ashcroft", And with that she hung up. I threw my phone next to me letting it hit the carpet and turned to shake Amy, who was now slightly asleep, awake.

"What the fuck do you want Karma?", She was irritated and I could here her wince in pain with every breath she took. "I need you to leave. You don't get to stay honey so go", I scoff slightly at her annoyance with me, but smile pleased when she stands and slips her shirt and shoes on, grabbing her keys.

"Fine, I'm out", She headed to the door and opened it walking out, slamming it behind her. I heard the door downstairs slam shut as well. I get she was in pain and all but why the hell would she think I would let her stay in? That was completely unlike her. All she did was come, fuck, cum, fuck again, repeat and then leave.

Whatever. It's been a long ass night and I have better things to do, like sleep. I turn the light off next to my bed and get under the covers. My eyes were heavy within minutes and i was gone. For now at least.

I scratched my head in annoyance and dropped my pencil and notebook on the empty desk. It was lunch time and I was alone in a classroom, tired and hungry. I wanted to get food but I was to tired to eat. I figured that I would just work on some homework to next period but I was already frustrated. I didn't get any sleep last night, only calls and texts from Liam. Telling me that he made sure she payed. That I belonged to him and not her. I was mad. Not at the calls, no I was annoyed by that, but I was mad at what he said.

Amy made her mark, which meant I was hers. All Liam really needed from me was my image. The one he helped me gain. He just wanted me at his arms, with a smile on my face as I wave hello to his family and walk around school with him.

Liam didn't care about me, he now knows I don't care about him. He also happens to know why I wanted him in the first place.

Everyone's winnings.

I chuckled at the words replaying in my head. I guess everyone is winning. I plop down on the chair and pull my phone out of my bag. One text message, and of course it was from Amy.

'Meet me at the burger joint down the road from school as soon as it ends. We need to talk.'

I shouldn't be fucking nervous. At all. It probably was to talk about sex. How I should improve. But that can't be it because that girl was not faking her orgasms or her moaning.

I had a bad feeling in my stomach, but underneath it I felt the good.

As I entered the burger place, I immediately spotted Amy. She wasn't alone. Their was a hot brunette sitting next to her and they were close and kissing. I made my way over to them and sat in front. Clearing my throat, I spoke. "What is it Raudenfeld?", The other girl rolled her eyes at me and I can't help the smirk that came across my face."I was wondering if you are up for something this weekend, my place of course." Oh Amy. What the fuck is it this time.

"Depends, what is it?", The other chick chuckled and I tried ignoring it. I looked at Amy and I swear, she had the hottest fucking look on her face.

"Let's have a threesome, Ashcroft"


	4. Chapter 4

**Let me know what you think (: review!**

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No. I don't do threeways, nor will I do it with some chick I rarely know and another chick who I've been fucking for three months alone. Amy was for me to fuck on my own time. I don't share my time with anyone else nor do I plan on it.

But fuck. Amy and that Anna chick, they were both incredibly hot. I spoke to Anna when I got up to go to the bathroom after saying a simple no to Amy. She followed me in and leaned against the wall as I used the bathroom and then proceeded to wash my hands. "You know..Karma..that name of yours is something. What goes around comes around. Right?", I had looked over at her and scoffed before going to dry my hands. "So, if you say no to this, thinking you will walk out of here all fine with Amy to fuck when you please, think again.", She pushed back off the wall and walked out of the bathroom, where I was left debating my thoughts.

Should I say yes? Should I share my Amy time with the new chick?

I really hope this goes good and worth my time. I don't want it to go to waste. With that, I walked out of the bathroom and towards Amy and Anna who were looking at me as I took a seat in front of them. "Hm, well, Amy, Looks like I'll be fucking both of you this weekend huh?", A smirk came to my lips as Amy licked hers and Anna wore a smirk too. "I'll be looking forward to you..Anna." I looked at her,winking slightly and leaning across the table planting a lingering kiss to her jaw, before moving back and pressing my lips slowly to Amy's.

I pulled away and stood up smirking at them both and making my way out of the burger place.

Mmm..just the thought of it made me heated.

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I was flustered, my legs were tired and my head was hurting. I had been walking the mall all day looking for the perfect outfit to wear for this weekend. I spoke to Amy about it last night and she told me her parents were out all weekend. Friday to Sunday, which meant that Anna, Amy and I could spend all weekend together.

Sex.

Alcohol.

And knowing Amy, probably a little something to get us on the extra mile.

This will most likely be the best fucking weekend ever.


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey guys! Here's Chapter 5, I'm already working on 6 because I have free time but either way, review and let me know what you thought!**

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"How much do you have?", There were a few beer bottles lying in the fridge inside a cabinet under some fruits. I looked over at Amy who was sitting on the counter eating some grapes and swinging her legs a little.

"Enough for the three of us Karma,"  
She chuckled a bit and hopped off the counter stepping towards me as her hands slip around my waist from behind,her lips pressing against the nape of my neck. I shivered a bit before closing the fridge door and turning around completely to face her.

Her hands lay on my lower back as she presses me closer against her,her eyes looking at my lips then into my own. This was different. Slow. Intimate. And it was new to me. Everything between me and Amy has always been fucking, so why is she acting like this?  
Her lips press to mine and the kiss was soft and gentle, it carried on for some seconds before we both pulled away completely. She dropped her arms and cleared her throat, stuttering on her words, "I-I should probably c-call Anna, See when she's coming..". She looked at me and hesitates for a moment before turning around and walking into the living room to make the call.  
That left me alone in the kitchen with a unusual feeling in my stomach and a tingle on my lips that she caused.

Anna arrived within an hour. All three of us were sitting on the couch, beers in hand, t.v on and Amy with an arm around me. It was different, like I said earlier, but I went with it not really caring and laid my head on her shoulder. Anna had her head on Amy's lap. Then it dawned on me what was really going to happen,and once again I felt anxious. I've been feeling like that since I woke up but it had subsided a bit. I look at Amy and then down at Anna,neither of them noticing.

Well it has to start one way or another right?

I face Amy and grab her chin forcing her to look at me, she looks confused for a moment until I bring my lips to meet hers in a slow,rough kiss. My left hand stayed gripping her chin as my right hand slipped down to grab the back of Anna's hair in a fist, pulling her up to join the kiss. I keep my eyes closed as I move my lips on to Anna's, trailing my tongue across her bottom lip as Amy begins to kiss under my earlobe slowly,sucking and biting. Anna opens her mouth,giving my tongue entrance. I slip it inside,tangling it up with hers as my left hand grips the back of Amy's hair tightly and my right tugs at Anna's waistband. I pull back as Amy lays me flat on the couch and grabs my shirt lifting it up over my head and throwing it aside. Anna comes around and hovers her face over mine as she stands on all fours behind me,her lips pressing to mine again.

Amy unclips my bra and pulls it off easily before moving her lips to my neck again and trailing them down to my left breast, she kissed around it before taking my nipple into her mouth and sucking on it slowly,her tongue swirling around before pulling away and kissing down to the waistband of my panties.

Anna moved her lips from mine and pulled her shirt off then unclipped her bra throwing both things alongside my own on the floor. She began kissing her way down my collarbone,giving me access to her own collarbone and the center of her chest. Her lips moved to my right nipple as Amy did the usual and pulled my panties off with her teeth. She used the tip of her tongue and licked her way up,grabbing the back off Anna's head and pulling her lips away from my bare chest and on to her own. Anna moved away from Amy and got off the couch from behind me. She stood in front of us both as she unbuttoned her pants and slid them down with her underwear.

Holy fuck.

And I'm sure Amy was thinking the same thing by the look on her face when I turned to look at her. I sat up and got on my knees in front of her on the couch so I was facing her sitting level. I moved my hands down to the hem of her shirt and gripped it tightly lifting it up over her head,once it was gone I pressed my lips to hers and took her hands in mine pulling her up off the couch with me. I pulled my lips back and looked straight at her,unbuttoning her jeans slowly before pushing them down. It wasn't my first time seeing Amy like this, obviously. But there was something different about it. Something beautiful.

I hooked my fingers into her underwear and tugged at it before Anna went behind her and began placing slow kisses moving down her back, unhooking her bra letting it fall, and then continuing the kisses slowly to her lower back. Amy moaned and I captured her lips with mine,her arms wrapping around my waist. I went deep into this kiss, why? I don't know. But I do know one thing.

I had a little something for Amy Raudenfeld.

And this was going to be one hell of a weekend.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6! This chapter was something, but I needed to be able to show Karma when she is feeling most vulnerable and how quickly she recovered from it. Remember, Amy isn't exactly nice to women in this fic but that'll soon change. Enjoy (:**

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Anna was gone, she left not to long ago after her mom called telling her to come home immediately. That left me and Amy, alone.

She was on the bed leaning against the headboard staring up at the ceiling. I stood in front of the small desk she had across the room, the lights were dim and I turned on some music. The small strum of a guitar came on, playing a slow rhythm.

I closed my eyes, swaying my hips slightly from side to side as the music plays.

_My baby lives in shades of blue  
Blue eyes and jazz and attitude._

I turned slowly,my hands sliding my shirt up as I trailed them up to wrap them in my hair, keeping my hips swaying to the music and my eyes opened.

_But you are invincible  
I can't break through your world._

I looked at Amy, who was biting her lip and standing up from the bed.

_'Cause you live in shades of cool  
Your heart is unbreakable._

Her hands layed on my hips pressing our bodies close, swaying to the music together, slowly.

_But I can't help him, can't make him better  
And I can't do nothing about his strange weather._

The song picks up a rough pace with a guitar solo, her eyes are looking straight into mine.

She slams me against the desk pressing are lips together, my legs locking around her waist as her hands wander all over my body, are lips moving fast together.

She lifts me up and throws me on the bed immediately pulling her shirt off and throwing it aside. She crawls over me connecting our lips once more. I grab the sides of her waist and flip us over, straddling her. I lift my shirt up and throw it next to hers, to her luck I wasn't wearing a bra. I leaned down kissing across her jawline and down to her neck slowly as her hands grip my ass tightly, my own hands on either side of her on the bed.

With a quick movement, she flips us, unclipping her bra and shrugging it off, locking her eyes with mine. Her finger tips slowly trail up my stomach and down my arms before reaching my own and locking them together,pinning my arms above my head.

Her eyes skimmed my upper body then rested on my underwear. She held my arms above my head with her right hand and let the left wander down to my underwear,ripping it off completely. I felt the blood inside my mouth from how hard I was biting my lip. She released my arms and trailed kisses down my stomach to my waistline, moving her eyes to look up at me. With the tip of her tongue,she licked her way down my core,causing me to curl my toes and grasp her hair with my hand. The other gripped the side of the bed as her tongue moved in a slow circular motion against me. This was passionate, not rough. And to my surprise, I had been longing it for quite some time. Real sex. Or as others may call it, making love. And that's what Amy and I were doing. Or at least I thought she was.

Her hands lay on top of my thighs as she slides her tongue in me gently, causing a moan to escape my lips. That gave her more power and energy to gently thrust it inside. It wasn't long before her fingers slid into me, sending me completely over the edge.

I released my grip on the bed, breathing hard and laying my palms against my eyes. I felt dizzy all of a sudden. I don't know why, but it was hard to control. I got my breathing back to normal, but my head was spinning. Amy looked up at me and crawled over next to me, laying on her side propping her head up with her hand. I looked over at her and immediately, everything stopped spinning. There was something in her eyes. I couldn't make out what it was, but it was glowing. That gave me a good feeling in my chest and stomach.

I leaned over and pressed my lips slowly against hers, laying my hand on her cheek and the other on her waist. I pulled back slightly to look at her but didn't get much of a chance because she immediately pressed our lips together again. I was disconnected from our surroundings, from the music and lights. All I focused on was Amy and her lips. I heard her mumble something against mine but I couldn't make it out, I was lost into the kiss to focus on words.

She laid me back against the bed and pulled her lips away, bringing the covers over us. I looked at her, a bit confused as to what she was doing.  
"Just this one time, alright?" There was reassurance and a bit of hope in her eyes. I smiled a bit and nodded my head. God, this was new to me. Amy and I..we never cuddled. We never shared a kiss like that. Everything was new and happening so fast. "Amy.." I propped my head up just how she had with her hand, facing her and taking her hand in my free one, she did the same and now we were both facing each other, her eyes on mine and mine on our hands. "This is completely weird.." I let out a small chuckle and heard her do the same. "I know it is, it's more than new to me. But I like it Karma..the same way I like you..doing what we just did with you.." I moved my eyes up to meet hers.

I never had a relationship. Liam and I technically aren't dating. We never even went out on an actual date. Amy and I always had just sex. No relationship stuff, so this approach she was making had me being a bit hesitant but still giving me a feeling I couldn't explain to myself let alone her. Instead of saying something, I stayed quiet. I didn't want to fuck up. Not with her.

"Please say something, Ashcroft," She let out a little smile, looking at me with her eyebrows raised. She's to fucking adorable to ignore. "I don't want to say something that will fuck up the moment, Raudenfeld," We both let out a chuckle and she leaned in pecking my lips,whispering "Then how about you show me what you feel for me.."

But I wouldn't allow myself to feel this way. Not for her. She's just a fuck buddy. And Liam is my popularity manager.

_My baby lives in shades of cool  
Blue heart and hands and aptitude  
He lives for love, for women, too  
I'm one of many, one is blue._


	7. Chapter 7

**And boom Chapter 7 is here!**

**I read one of the things one of you said about how easily Amy isn't getting Karma. And I'm glad you noticed, I don't want to jump into Karmy that quickly. I wanna take it slow. Karma isn't letting anyone in, especially not Amy who has a chain of females to sleep with at any time. I love all the fics on here but a few jump into their relationship too fast; not giving them other thoughts besides "I think I'm falling for her.." And that's what I'm here to do, to not give Karma thoughts on falling for Amy, I want to develop her feelings and their relationship in a different way and I hope you guys enjoy it! So I'll let you read from here on out (:**

**P.s, P.O.V switched to Amy for the first half of this chapter.**

My mom told me once when I was younger that the best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your friends, the ecology, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny.

And here I was. Blaming Karma. No she wasn't my friend, I couldn't stand talking to her for a second if there wasn't any kissing or sex. So instead, I blame her for what has happened to me. Twice.

I was on my way back from dropping her off at her house when I pulled up on my driveway. When I got out, I got fucking slammed against the car door and punched in the gut, pushed to the ground and kicked repeatedly. There was a shit load of blood coming from my mouth and my head was spinning as pain took over my body. I looked up even though my vision was a bit blurry and I managed to see who decided to beat the fuck out of me in my own drive way. What a dick.

I still got some words out, though the pain was clear in them, "Maybe she wouldn't be fucking me if you picked up your game Booker, I'm better than you dude. Face it. I lead the schools Sex Chain. All you get are my sloppy seconds." I kept talking and even got out a raspy laugh at the end as I held my stomach and spit out blood. Fuck man. Fuck fuck fuck.

I heard a chuckle before I saw his feet walk away from me and down the sidewalk. I groaned as I stood up, my body complaining from the pain. I walked slowly into my house, making sure to lock the door and going upstairs. This one was worse than the first one. Way worst.

I peeled my shirt and pants off along with my undergarments, making my way into the bathroom and turning on the hot shower. I stepped inside as soon as steam filled the air and leaned my forehead against the wall letting the water hit me. It felt good, soothing. But it didn't subside my thoughts.

Fucking Karma Ashcroft. Bitch has a nice ass but a dirty head. Look where that fucking got us. Me mostly. In pain and fucking alone as always. And I'm getting real sick and tired of listening to my own damn voice and her in my head.

And fucking Liam Booker. If he treated and pleased her right then I wouldn't be fucking her right now. I only fuck her because I feel bad for her. Liam isn't a nice guy and I know that she's getting sloppy shit from him, so I talked to her one day and we ended up in the girls bathroom inside a stall. That was three months ago. I won't lie, Sex with Karma was great. She's amazing in bed and knows what she is doing. It's the consequences that come from being with the fucking girl.

Thats when my moms voice came back into my head. "The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your friends, the ecology, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny." I repeated that a few times in my head and I got it. Quicker than I normally would.

This was my fault, my shit to deal with. I was the one who went up to Karma and decided to sleep with her. Even worse, I was the one who caused Liam to be the way he is. I chose to play the field. Taking his role as a sex beast away from him. I made him look desperate in front of the school.

This was my fucking problem and I had to fix it. Getting rid of the pretty auburn haired bitch was step one. Making nice with Liam was step two. And laying low with how I exploit my sexual activities was step three.

I got out of the shower and slipped into my black sports bra and boy shorts, laying in bed staring up at the ceiling. Tomorrow, I had to get this shit settled before it escalated.

I do not give a fuck about Karma Ashcroft, and I am not letting that bitch and her little fucker of a boy toy bring me down.

You gotta play nice with your enemies to be evil.

I wiped my mouth as I stood and walked back from Liam who was now buckling up his jeans. I grabbed my brown purse and pecked his lips as I walked out of the art room. I fixed my hair and re-applied my red lipstick as I walked to the courtyard to find Shane.

What the fuck.

They have never gotten along, ever.

I made my way towards a smiling Amy and Shane, who seemed to be having an actual conversation before I intervened.

"As far as I know, you two fucking hate each other." I looked to Shane but he had a smirk on his face, so I turned to Amy and she was shaking her head slightly, smiling. "Things can change Karma." Her words sounded so much worse if you read behind them. "But now that you are here, I'm gonna have to talk to you. Shane, excuse us please." She took my arm and dragged me into the school down the now half empty hallway and inside a utility closet.

"You know Karma, you've caused me a lot of shit." I was confused at what she meant, but that was a little bit before I took a good look at the bags under her eyes from lack of sleep and a busted lip. I can't believe him.

I look down and take the hem of her shirt lifting it up slowly till I had a full view of her stomach and chest. There was a lot of bruises, some purple and blue, others extremely dark. I let her shirt drop and looked up at her. I did feel bad because that looked painful, but I could careless. She brought this on herself.

"Well then maybe you should stay away from every girl in school for a while." I meant that when I said it. It's her own fault. "Yeah, that includes you as well." No wait that backfired, every girl EXCEPT me.

"No Amy..wait I didn't mean that. I meant every girl, just not me." I looked at her softly, hoping to see a change in her now smirking face.

"This is me fucking off from your life Ashcroft," With that, she opened the door and walked out of the closet, leaving me alone and angry.

"NO I WILL NOT CALM DOWN SHANE! THAT FUCKING BITCH JUST RUINED MY SEX LIFE!" I yelled that pretty loud into the phone, I felt bad for yelling at Shane, he was always so nice to me. But I was mad.

Amy fucking Raudenfeld left me. She literally told me she was fucking off and walked out.

"This is fucking frustrating Shane." I sighed deeply. "I know it is Karms but at least you got Liam" He let out a laugh and I shook my head.

"Shane I'm being serious, who am I gonna fuck when he can't give it to me?" I've never been more irritated, annoyed, angry, upset and every other feeling there is, as I was now. Do you know how hard it is to find someone with a tongue like Amy's?

"God fucking dammit." I hung up on him and shut my phone off, standing and grabbing my shoes. I slipped them of and made my way downstairs and out the front door not bothering letting my parents know. I can't just not do anything about this.

I didn't want to fuck anyone else. I was already use to Amy and her body. I know her moves and the way she breathes. I know where she places her lips and where I place mine. I know that girls body like the back of my hand and I was just too fucking lazy to learn someone else's. But that doesn't mean that I won't try. I know exactly who would give in. Straight or not.

I made my way to Amy's place, knocking on the door. To my unfortunate surprise, it was Amy to open. I pushed past her and made my way upstairs, ignoring her calling after me.

I opened the door to Lauren's room and slammed it shut behind me locking it.


	8. Chapter 8

**You ready for chapter 8? Well I hope you are. I think you'll like my new addition. It's gonna be fun..and sexy.**

* * *

"So who is she? Who's the new fresh meat?" I looked at Shane, practically pleading with my eyes and all I got was a shrug and smirk.

I hate when he acts stupid it always ticks me off.

"Shane stop being a dick and tell her before she explodes." Liam surprisingly spoke up, clearly annoyed by me and my constant questions. I'm honestly surprise Liam is even sitting with us out in the field today. He's always off fucking some other bitch.

"You'll figure it out. Plus. I think you have bigger things to worry about." He raised one eyebrow smiling as Amy walked by in front of us, making her way towards some chick who seemed to be thrilled to see her. Shocker. I want to throw up at the first glance.

I rolled my eyes and turned my attention to Liam who was also staring at her. I slapped his chest gently "Hey.." I opened up his arm and wrapped it around my shoulder leaning into him. I never really showed any PDA with Liam, but I was bored and just wanted to cuddle with someone for a bit. I felt him kiss my head and lean against the tree we were sitting in front of.

Amy looked our way and shook her head a bit before the girl grabbed her hand and dragged her towards the parking lot to what I assume to be her car.

Amy can never give it a break.

* * *

After the bell rang, I had stood up and bid goodbye to Liam. I made my way into the school and towards my class, bumping into someone on the way there. I dropped her phone and bent to get it for her, once I did I stood up and handed it to her. That's when I got a look at her face before she turned and sped off down the hall with a schedule in hand and her phone in another.

Hm. I like new girls. Their the fun ones.

Her face was imprinted in my mind and I kept replaying it over and over in my head as I stepped into class and took my seat at the back.

She was hot. Really hot. Which means I need to get a hold of her before Amy does.

Speaking of the devil, she decided to sit next to me today. Having a lot of open seats that were not yet filled by the rest of our classmates.

"What did she taste like?" I smirked at that, big time. "Juicy, sweet. Just right." I hear her let out a small laugh before whispering "Mmm Karma, don't tempt me. We are in class sweet heart. And I already called us quits." Is she being serious?

"Fuck you Amy. You can't just grab them and throw them then expect to be able to pick it up like nothing happened. That's not how it fucking works." I didn't bother looking at her. "Jeez, not even after all those amazing orgasms I gave you?" Well that one really ticked me off. I grabbed my bag and stood up from my seat before turning to face her.

"I was faking it, fuck you." And with that, I walked out.

* * *

I wanted to turn her down and make her feel bad for that, but I couldn't because she was pissed enough as it was.

I know she said she was faking it to make me mad, because that girl was doing anything but faking orgasms.

But I just sat there, quiet. The few people that had walked in had heard and gave me a amused look but all I did was give them the finger and they turned their heads forward.

Karma was over fucking dramatic sometimes. Not only was she a bitch, but she was a dramatic bitch. Who will try anything to make you feel bad and will most likely succeed.

I have never been happier to have called it quits with a sex buddy than I had been with Karma. I'm glad I don't do relationships, I can't imagine being in one with her.

Plus, love wasn't for me. Beer, occasional one night stands and threeways were more of my scene. But love? Relationships? Forget about it. I'll refuse myself from falling for anyone at all. I don't need anyone inside.

But I just didn't know that it all might change just as quickly as I said those words.

* * *

I was walking to the main office to pick up some papers Liam asked me for, and as I walked in, I once again ran into someone.

Yummy.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. I was just busy reading some papers and I-", "Don't worry about it love. Plus, this is our second run in today." I smiled, my best flirtatious smile that I could give. She looked at me and then a bit of relief washed over her face. "Right, you grabbed my phone for me. I never said thank you. I was in a bit of a rush." I heard the nervousness in her voice as she stared at me.

"Mm, that's fine sweety. My names Karma." I extended my hand, biting my lip slightly as she took it. Soft. Cold. The perfect finger sizes as well. Just the girl I needed to get the job done.

"It's a pleasure..I guess? Look I wish I could stay and chat but I need to go find my next class before the bell rings again for last block. Hopefully I'll see you soon." Oh baby you will, right in bed.

I was in a rush, I had detention and the last thing I needed was more detention for being fucking late for detention. I speed walked down the hall and made a turn into another hallway before running right into a girl. She stepped back holding on to both my arms as I held on to her elbows.

I caught her eyes in mine, both of us speechless and lost in the moment. I saw a her mouth open but no words came out. And I had a feeling I was doing the same, due to my own lack of words.

I felt my mouth go completely dry, and strings were being strummed in my stomach. She was beautiful. Gorgeous. Everything someone could ask for. And here I was, speechless with a dry mouth and holding on to her.

I was disappointed when she pulled away, due to wanting to hold her forever. This was crazy. I don't feel this way. I never planned on it and refused myself to do so. But this was different. She was different.

"I.." She tried to say something but stopped, so I took the lead. "I'm um..I was in a hurry to get to detention..sorry..","No it's fine..I was also in a hurry to get to my next class. I don't want to uh..to be late on my first day." She was new. Which meant she doesn't know who I am or what I do and I really wanna keep it like that.

I don't want to fuck up. Not with her. I don't even know the girl and I already don't want to lose her.

"I'm..I'm Amy Raudenfeld." I surprised myself as the words came out of my mouth. "I'm Elsa..Elsa Reed." She had her hands folded behind her back and was biting her bottom lip shyly and nervously as she looked down before looking up at me.

"Well Elsa..hopefully we will see each other again?" I saw it. I swear to fucking god there was a spark in her eyes and then a smile crept on to her lips. "Definitely..Goodbye Amy.." She turned slowly, the smile playing on her lips as she walked down the hall.

Man, that was the best run in with a new girl I've ever had in my life, and I didn't want it to end.


	9. Chapter 9

All I gotta say is..enjoy chapter 9.

Our heads turned to the front door of the cafeteria when the laughing stop and so did the conversation. "Cue the evil music, here comes Cruella de Vil with her Jasper and Horace in one man." I let out a laugh as Karma made her way towards us taking a seat across the table in front of us, bidding goodbye to Liam as he walked off to talk to a few of his buddies.

"Amy." She said coldly, only causing me to laugh. "Karma, or should I call you the sex addict now?" I smirked, knowing she would retaliate. "I wouldn't be speaking of sex addictions if I were you honey." I hear Shane snicker and replaced my smirk with a smile. "Who's your new play mate, Karms?".

Karma, surprisingly, had gotten laid with several women in the past few weeks. Not just Lauren. And it seemed that there was always someone new that would stick around longer than most. Which is why I couldn't help but ask.

"Mmm..she's walking towards us right now." Before I got the chance to turn my head to look and see who it was. She was already seated next to Karma. Kissing her gently.

Elsa.

No. No. No.

I let my face drop and my heart sank. She got her.

She got the only girl I've ever been interested in.

Elsa and I have been talking a lot lately since our encounter but not once did she mention Karma. And my heart was now shattering. Once they pulled back from each other, Elsa's eyes caught my own, which were hurting and it was clear. A small frown crept on to her lips but Karma kissed her cheek and turned to meet me.

"Elsa here, is my girl." I heard her emphasize on the word my, which only infuriated me. I stood from the table and grabbed my bag walking away from them and out the door of the cafeteria.

This is so damn fucking typical. Every time I fucking find the right person, someone else gets them first. This is why I have those damn walls built. But I let Elsa take them down and Karma came along to help.

And I know Elsa knew my feelings for her. She knew very fucking clear after the kiss I had shared with her.

We were on our way to her locker during class time. I had skipped my period and I caught her coming out of the office. So I walked her there and she was talking away about some stupid homework assignment. I was staring at her lips the whole time. So, I grabbed her waist and slammed her against the locker and kissed her hard but that turned into something more deep. Something more passionate.

We didn't talk about that kiss. We kept quiet. And now? Now we aren't gonna talk at all. At least I don't plan on it. I'm tired of picking up someone else's pieces when I have trouble picking up my own.

* * *

Thank god she's gone. I didn't want her around Elsa. At all. Elsa is my new fuck toy and I can't lose her. Not to Amy at least. I got Elsa by luck in a bathroom stall. She gave in pretty easy and I was glad.

Now I gotta deal with Amy and her fucking jealousness and I need her to just fuck off completely.

She was a washed up whore who recently hasn't been getting any at all and i wasn't about to let her.

I looked at Elsa who looked at the door of the cafeteria. Are you serious? I waved my fingers in front of her face and that caught her attention as she faced to look at me.

"Honey she isn't coming back, alright?" I was annoyed, but pleased when she nodded her head slightly and went back to eating her food.

* * *

It was midnight and I was awake laying in bed. My phone was buzzing from texts that Elsa has sent. I ignored them, until there was a knock on my window. I got up and opened the curtain, a bit surprised when I saw Elsa herself there. I opened up for her and stepped back as she climbed in,closing the window behind her and turning to me. She looked cute in her black over sized sweat shirt and blue jean shorts. It was perfect for her.

She walked up to me without any spoken words and wrapped her arms around my neck,pressing her gentle lips to mine. I didn't think about it but my hands were on her lower back pushing us closer together. There it was. The strings in my stomach being strummed again.

I lifted her up, getting her to wrap her legs around my waist, pulling us closer together as I walked her over to my bed and laid her down gently,her pulling me down along. She wouldn't release my waist at all.

I moved my lips down to her neck, kissing gently and slowly on her pulse points as her hands tangle in my hair. She tasted so damn good. And we haven't even fully started yet.

I pulled back, earning a whimper and a quiet whisper. "Aims.." I looked at her and began unbuttoning my flannel pajama shirt, throwing it aside. I never wore a bra to sleep so I'm giving her quite the site. I moved back down and kissed her again slowly, but this time it was her who pulled away. "Let me get my shirt off too, silly." I chuckled as she unwrapped her legs and sat up in the center of the bed pulling her shirt off and unclipping her bra, throwing it aside somewhere. I took in her body, my mouth slightly open. She was gorgeous. And I needed her.

I crawled up on the bed, sitting on my knees in front of her motioning her to lay back. Once she did, I pulled off her shorts and sandals, throwing them aside with her shirt. Karma was not like this with her. I know Karma. She was a rough, annoying bitch.

I leant down and kissed her again, surprised when she flipped us over and took the lead. Her hands traveled down my stomach slowly and she pulled away,pulling my pajama pants off with my underwear.

It changed as fast as it started. Her hands traveled down my legs as she leant up and pressed her lips hard to mine,moving them down my neck and chest. Her mouth found my nipple, sucking on it hard, giving it a soft bite. I moaned her name out loud as I gripped her hair tightly, tugging it down. She got the hint and moved her lips down my stomach to center. She took a moment to look at it. To really look before she looked up at me. I gave her a small nod.

She didn't bother with the foreplay, I was very very visibly wet and throbbing for her. Her mouth met mine in a fierce connection. She was sucking on me,using the tip of her tongue to create circular motions around my clit slowly. Another moan left my mouth when she licked her way down to my entrance,slipping her tongue inside me along with her three fingers.

"Oh fuck." That was the only thing I could muster up as she slid in a fourth finger and licked away with her tongue. What was next was just as good. Her hand slipped into me slowly up to her knuckles,thrusting fast hitting just the spot.

It was too much for me and I screamed. I literally let out the loudest scream as I came on her hand and tongue, letting my juices flow into her mouth and on her hand.

She pulled back,wiping her chin from my orgasm, her short hair disheveled as she crawled up to meet my lips,laying next to me. I looked at her and her arm slipped under my head, the other laying on my cheek as she pressed her lips to mine.

Elsa..she was it man. And I do not regret it. At all.

* * *

You like Elsa? Because Amy sure as fuck does


	10. Chapter 10

Shades of Cool Ch 10

**So a lot of people have been asking if this fic was going to be Karmy endgame. And I plan on answering that. Maybe it will be Karmy or maybe it will be ElsaxAmy.**

**If you have trouble picturing Elsa, She's Crystal Reed. I know I rushed Elsa and Amy but I had a good reason to it.**

**My blog is .com drop questions in my ask for answers you may want. Enjoy the fic (;**

On bad days,Amy and I fucked harder than usual. So through all that heavy sex, our emotions were pouring out with our orgasms. That was our own way of connecting, that kept the whole sex for sex relationship alive. She couldn't do it with other girls, only me, according to her.

And right now, I was having a bad day and disappointedly, Elsa cannot get the job done. She was too soft and gentle. Too sweet. But that doesn't mean I'm going to jump right into Amy, I won't give her the satisfaction.

Plus, I don't think she would. She's been giving Elsa these weird, goofy looks lately. That pissed me off. They have been acting like this all day and Elsa hadn't answered her phone last night.

When I talked to her about it today, she said she was busy with family.

Whatever, that's not what I need her for. In fact, I don't need her at all right now. I need and want Amy. But that is also not gonna happen. So in a simpler form, I'm fucked.

"A stud lesbian with a sex record the size of Mount Rushmore." I couldn't hold the laugh that was in me when Shane said that. He was right, of course. He always is.

"Well it's true Aims, and now look at you. All goofy and blushy and soft like whip cream thanks to miss Elsa Reed." He let out a chuckle and bumped his shoulder to mine as we walked down the full hallway. "Im not soft, nor am I blushy or goofy." Elsa and I weren't together, but i wouldn't mind if we were. At all.

"Oh,Raudenfeld. Yes you are, my love." He smiled at me and looked ahead, giving a even bigger smile to an approaching Elsa. I smiled too, and it was a real one.

"Hey." She was a bit closer to me and soon she had her lips on mine, kissing me softly. I returned the kiss but pulled away after Shane cleared his throat. I looked at him and then turned my head to the other side of me as someone tapped my shoulder. Fuck.

"Really Amy? Really?" She flipped me off and walked away from me,grabbing Elsa's arm taking her with her.

I felt my face flush and looked at Shane. Everyone was staring. Which only made it worse. What the fuck is wrong with her.

Once I got Elsa alone, I didn't bother speaking. Instead, I slapped her. She looked down, her eyes pinching back tears. "Stay the fuck away from Amy. She doesn't love you, she doesn't care about you either. Amy doesn't do love, in case you haven't heard. She's only there for one thing and one thing only and that's for me to give you. Get use to it." I stepped back,waving goodbye with my fingers before walking off towards were I last saw Amy.

Karma was really in this for herself only. She didn't have a heart. Or at least she pretended not to care. She was a sociopath. Only mimicking human emotions when she saw it was the right time. Only when she wanted something is when she was heartless. She has Elsa. What more could she want? She gets to have her popularity and her pleasure. She gets to have it all. Yet she is still fucking my life over.

I'm sick of her. And you know what? Fuck her getting Elsa. I won't allow it.

I won't allow that girl to break Elsa's heart.

My lip was bleeding and I was on the floor in my room on my knees looking down, breathing heavy and half naked with an angry Elsa in front of me.

She clenched the back of my hair in a fist and yanked my head back to look at me. I never felt more fear in my life than I had now.

"You either stay the fuck away from Amy and I or I'll cut off those pretty little eye lids of yours. Maybe that way you can actually see the world around you and the people in it that have been hurt from you. You are a ruthless bitch with zero emotions. I may be new but I know enough about you to know what you are. You've made it very clear all on your own. So I'm only going to tell you this once Karma. Fuck off." She threw my head back down causing it to hit the floor making me whimper in pain before looking up at her.

"Oh and one more thing." She knelt in front of me. "I'm gonna go to Amy's house this weekend and I'm gonna let her do things to me you didn't know were fucking possible. Things you won't be doing to my body anytime soon." She stood up and headed for my door, walking out.

That was fucking scary. And she wasn't getting the fuck away with it.

"So what did she say after all that?" Elsa and I were in my room,laying down talking. She was telling me about her earlier feud with Karma and how she decided to act.

"She didn't say anything. The last thing I told her was that i was going to let you do 'things' to me. That pissed her off inside I'm sure of it."

I couldn't help but laugh a bit. Elsa was standing up for me. For us. And that honestly made me feel a happiness I haven't felt in a long time.

She looked over at me and leaned forward kissing my lips softly before pulling back. Her eyes stared into my own and I pulled her closer not breaking the gaze. "What things were you speaking of, Elsa?" I looked at her as I bit my lip,leaning my forehead to hers. She wasn't saying anything at the moment. But it was enough for me to show the lust I was holding behind my eyes. And I saw it in hers as well.

"Mmm how badly do you want to find out?" She sat on me, straddling my thighs as her finger tips laid on my stomach. She had this look on her face when she stared at me. It wasn't just lust. It was something else.

I pulled her down to me and kissed her gently,letting my hand lay on her cheek and the other on her waist. She deepened the kiss and I felt my stomach explode with my heart.

That was my confirmation.

I was in love with Elsa Reed.

And Karma wasn't about to change that.


	11. Chapter 11

**Cruel world by Lana Del Rey is the song on this one. Enjoy Chapter 11, because it's gonna get better.**

_  
_Got your bible, got your gun  
And you like to party and have fun  
And I like my candy and your women  
I'm finally happy now that you're gone._

I was staring up at the ceiling letting the song play, my eyes holding back a few tears.

_Get a little bit of Bourbon in 'ya  
Get a little bit suburban._

Three weeks since Elsa and I made love. Three weeks since we got together. I was really holding on to this one. I tried my hardest.

_You're dancing circles around me  
You're fucking crazy  
Oh, you're crazy for me._

I cracked, like every shell there is. It was a big crack before I crawled my way back into her bed.

_I shared my body and mind with you._

_That's all over now  
I did what I had to do._

Karma pulled me in. It didn't take much for her to do so. A few words whispered into my ear and I was licking away at her again.

_And you love to party and have fun  
And I love your women and all of your heroin._

I turned my body and grabbed my shoe from the floor, throwing it at the radio causing the music to shut off.

Lana del Rey was my chocolate of the week. Her and her fucking relatable songs. She sang about me. Not specifically but close enough.

I'm not some teenage girl going through some phase that can relate to her music. No. It wasn't like that.

Those lyrics she sings, the party and women and the drugs. The non existent love. That wasn't some phase for me.

That was my life. Who I am. Who I became.

I didn't know if I could ever bring myself to change. No matter how so desperately I want to. I can't. I broke Elsa's poor little heart last night when she caught me leaving Karma's house with my shirt wrinkled and my hair a mess, buckling my jeans.

I was having a bad day. And usually Karma helps me with that. I couldn't go to Elsa. She was a love maker, not a fucker. She wouldn't help. As bad as I felt that I got caught, I was a bit happy.

Maybe it's because I'm not tied down.

Or maybe it was because Karma…

No. Never.

That wouldn't ever even come across her head. And I wasn't going to let it come across mine.

It was different with her.

_No,stop._

It's rough, it matches my pace.

_You are in love with Elsa._

I know were to put my lips. What to say.

_Get Elsa back._

She knows how to do the same.

_Elsa is what matters._

Under all that sex with Karma..

_Elsa is who you want_.

There was passion.

_Elsa is made for you._

There was intimacy.

_You were made for Elsa_.

There was knowing.

_You and Elsa are one heart together._

There was love.

_But Elsa will never be Karma_.


	12. Chapter 12

Shades of Cool Ch 12

Amy's POV for Ch 12!

Final chapter!

You guys asked for an endgame right? Here you go.

My lips are cold from the weather.

I was sitting outside on my porch at the middle of the night.

Everything was hitting me.

Every woman that's been in my bed. Every kiss I've shared.

Everything.

I couldn't help but just think about it. To remanence on all my bad deeds.

I don't deserve to be falling in love. I don't deserve to know this kind of emotion. What I deserve is a good ass kicking from Jesus.

Karma and I are two different people. I gave her what she wanted for a long time and she got it. But that is all she wanted. Yes, at one point i did too, but underneath it was my love for her. I want to kiss her and tell her she's my baby. She's my girl.

These feelings are killing me. And the worst part is, I don't know what to do about them.

And Elsa. Poor, sweet Elsa. She may have slapped me when she saw me leaving Karma's but she was crying. And that hurt me. She's too precious to cry. And what hurts even more is that I was the one who did that to her.

That pisses me off. Elsa shouldn't have to cry like that. She didn't deserve it. But she isn't the first.

I seem to make lots of girls cry. Worst of all, my family. My grandparents, my mother, my step dad and my real dad. They all cried because of who I am. They want me to change. But I can't. I can't let myself change. At least I think I can't.

My life is a pile of shit, like me. The people who cry over me and the way I am are the fuckers that have pushed me to it. I didn't do this on my fucking own. They did it for me.

My grandmother always, right in front of me, cheated on my grandfather. My shitty mother married 4 times and my dad left to do his own stray of women.

You think it's just me and my fucking sad story? You think I'm the only one in the family?

I'm surrounded by assholes and liars. No one can possibly be sin free in this family.

Yet here goes my Christian mother and her fucking tears. "You're gay?!" Yes bitch. Go have your next wedding. Go pretend to be perfect.

I sigh deeply and stand up from the swing,making my way inside locking the door and up to my room. I plopped on my bed and stared up at the empty ceiling.

Empty.

I didn't fight the sleep, instead I let it take me.

The next day at school was a bit awkward for me. Elsa kept staring, I hadn't seen Karma yet. I didn't want to at the moment to be honest.

I kept to myself. Cool, collected and quiet. I actually didn't skip any classes and I payed attention. Anything to keep my thoughts on my relationship life subsided.

I still didn't know what I would do with my feelings. I didn't know if I should tell her or if I should make things right with Elsa but still keep Karma on the side.

Maybe it's a different Karma that will get me if I do that. But I don't care. I really don't.

It was lunch. I was sitting in the courtyard. Waiting. That's what I was doing, waiting for Karma.

I stood up once I saw her and made my way over to her. She looked great. Wonderful.

I got a bit closer.

Her hair was straight today.

Closer.

She had blue eye liner on.

Closer.

She was wearing a cute, black flower dress.

Closer.

I won't tell her. Karma won't know my feelings. All she will know, is that I'm gonna fuck her.

No feelings said. No harm done.

After all, why ruin great sex with a few feelings?


End file.
